Last Wednesday made NO SENSE! Day 11 of SALTI should have clarified the playoff picture a lot. There was an edge case where a massive amount of upsets happened that could muddy up the playoff picture rather than make it clearer. But that wasn’t likely, right?
Wrong. Day 11 was the day of the underdog. Of the sixteen matches we had, the lower ranked team won TEN of them! These weren’t some mild underdogs either. The bottom ranked teams in both divisions won. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. To quote Jason Kelce of the Philadelphia Eagles after they won the Super Bowl, “You know what an underdog is? It’s a hungry dog.”
Well, the hungry dogs ate last week. So let’s dive in and see what a mess the underdogs have made of the S.A.L.T.I. standings.
Take a look at the list of upsets last week. I’ll arrange them in order of how unlikely they were:
- #16 Brain N’ Bronze (1-7) defeated #6 Magnificent Capes (6-4)
- #16 Spiked Shells (1-7) defeated #7 Princess Weh… (6-4)
- #15 Big Chargy Balls of Death (2-8) defeated #3 January 10th (7-3)
- #14 Bad Matchup (2-8) defeated #5 Like Father Like Son (6-4)
- #10 Nightmare Elite (5-5) defeated #1 Corpse Brigade (9-1)
- #13 Fox Kids (3-7) defeated #8 Luma Naughty (5-5)
- #12 Punching Blades (4-6) defeated #7 Mew2King & Abadango (6-4)
- #9 Peachy Queens (5-5) defeated #4 A Little Weird, A Little Wild (7-3)
- #9 Brothers From Another Mother (5-5) defeated #6 Super Luigi Bros. (6-4)
- #3 Fist & Fire (7-3) defeated #2 Termididdles (8-2)
Yeah. As you can see, this isn’t just some minor upsets here. The two bottom ranked teams won! However, as amazing as that is, even more crazy was every single team that had a 6-4 record LOST. There were six teams that had a record of 6-4. Even if you assumed they had a coin-flip’s chance of winning (which you’d assume better than a coin flip since they had a winning record) that would still be a 1-in-64 chance of that occurring.
And yet, even with a less than 2% chance of that occurring, this wouldn’t cause a jumble in the standings unless something equally weird happened with the six teams that had a 5-5 record. Oh wait, it nearly did. All but one team with a 5-5 record won last week. This has created a mind-blowing ELEVEN teams that have a 6-5 record.
That’s over one-third of the league. And it’s created this mess that is the current standings:
Please remember that you need to be an 8-seed or higher to get into the playoffs. If the playoffs started today there would be three teams that have WINNING RECORDS that wouldn’t get into the playoffs.
Even crazier is the fact that this has created such a jumbled mess that relies on tiebreakers that there are some oddities like the fact that Princess Weh… lost their match last week and remained the #7 seed. Brothers From Another Mother won their match and remained the #9 seed. And even crazier than all that was Peachy Queens winning their match last week… and moving DOWN from the #9 seed to the #10 seed.
I’ve always known it was possible to win and move down in the standings, but I’ve never seen it happen this late into a season because it takes so many things to break “right” for it to happen. But here we are.
The results are so stinking crazy that I have yet to discuss the fact that after starting the season off 9-0, the Corpse Brigade have lost two straight matches and ceded the #1 seed in the Mushroom Kingdom division to Dangerous to Game Alone.
So. There four matches left for each team. Eight wins can no longer be counted on to get you in the playoffs. It still might end up being the magic number as some of these 6-5 teams play one another but it’s no longer a number I feel comfortable quoting as being the magic number to get in. At this point you need 9 wins to guarantee your ticket in and if you can’t get to eight you have no shot. So, here is the situation:
Teams that have locked a playoff spot:
- Dangerous to Game Alone
- Star Blitz
- Corpse Brigade
1 win and they’re in:
- Fist & Fire
- Musicians Unite
Teams that have been eliminated from contention
- One Punnnnnnnnnnnnch
- Brain N’ Bronze
- Spiked Shells
- Big Chargy Balls of Death
- Bad Matchup
- Twoo Wuv
Never. Lose. Again.:
- Fox Kids
- Guns N’ Roses
- Transformers: Royals In Disguise
If you didn’t see your team name on that list… well, you’re part of the gaggle of teams at sitting around that 6-5 record and… well. It’s a mess. Hopefully a lot of the mess will clean itself up because a lot of teams with records ranging from 7-3 to 5-6 will be facing off against one another Tuesday and Wednesday.
Amongst the most critical matches are:
- Day 12
- #12 Brobot (4-7) vs. #4 January 10th (7-4)
- #9 Brothers from Another Mother (6-5) vs. #13 Fox Kids (4-7)
- #8 Nightmare Elite (6-5) vs. #6 Super Luigi Bros. (6-5)
- #4 A Little Weird, A Little Wild (7-4) vs. #7 Androgynous Anime Avatars (6-5)
- #5 The Pointy End (6-5) vs. #12 Dimensional Shift (5-6)
- #9 Magnificent Capes (6-5) vs. #8 Mew2King & Abadango
- #11 Punching Blades (5-6) vs. #10 Peachy Queens (6-5)
- Day 13
- #12 Brobot (4-7) vs #9 Brothers from Another Mother (6-5)
- #4 January 10th (7-4) vs #8 Nightmare Elite
- #10 Luma Naughty (5-6) vs #7 Princess Weh… (6-5)
- #4 A Little Weird, A Little Wild (7-4) vs #9 Magnificent Capes (6-5)
- #7 Androgynous Anime Avatars (6-5) vs #6 My Little Homie (6-5)
- #11 Punching Blades (5-6) vs #5 The Pointy End (6-5)
That… is a lot of critical matches. Again, I’d like to emphasize this close to the end of the season there isn’t usually this many super critical matches. But when the middle of the standings are packed tighter than a can of sardines in a pneumatic press every match begins to count.
Normally this is the part where I start talking about statistics but honestly I’m drained. You people are wearing me out with your incredibly unlikely standings! My heart can’t take much more of this stress. It does go to show you how incredibly close these teams are and how any team can beat any other team as long as that team isn’t my team of One Punnnnnnnnch who has managed to lose ten straight games. It is a testament to my sense of fair play that I haven’t just deleted Geno and Saitama’s .bin files and claimed there was some sort of boot sector error that deleted incompetence.
Regardless, here are the stats for your viewing pleasure
I don’t really have much to say other than the odd fact that A Little Weird, A Little Wild has both the best and worst Amiibo when it comes to Kills-to-Death ratio. That’s weird.
As usual, if you’d like to see how this crazy regular season wraps up you should swing by my twitch channel at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern on Tuesday and Wednesday nights to catch all the S.A.L.T.I. action. We’ve been having a blast in chat and would love to have you there too.
Additionally, this Saturday morning the S.L.A.P. Season 4 Playoffs will be wrapping up at 9am Pacific/Noon Eastern. The matches this Saturday were stressful with two of the quarterfinals coming down to a pivotal game 5. Oh, and one of them included my team, the Wiivengers, pulling off a major upset against the #1 seed. So I’m proud of that.
So yeah, hope to see you all tonight and Saturday for what should be some amazing and amusing Amiibo action. Until then though…
Make good decisions.